Say His Name

Someone asked me about him today…recalling his rise in journalism. This day popped into my head and heart.

Saugatuck, summer,1965.

He’d left his shift at noon to head to Lake Michigan…intent on finding me before I found another guy.

He was worried, could he trust me?

All he knew was that he cared about me and really needed to tell me something.

I was pretty naive and simple back then, not thinking beyond the moment. My roommates and I were like every other college student on hot sunny weekends…surely a rite of passage the first time you take off without parental or dorm director permission! It was the place to be, strolling along crowded Butler Street from one pub to the next checking out good-looking guys in madras shorts and tank tops.

There I was, talking with a group of frat boys when a car pulled up to the curb and two guys called my name. Jim was driving and his buddy Sarg was hanging out the side of a yellow Triumph beckoning me closer. Was that cool or what! Sarge jumped out, I hopped in and waved “See you later” to my pals. It was a moment indeed!

I was glad to see my boyfriend Jim but confused why he’d interrupt my weekend getaway with the girls. He said we needed to talk but kept pointing out landmarks and historic facts about this iconic beach town. He never asked about my friends, my plans or explain why he was still in his work clothes.

With his shirt sleeves rolled up, dress pants and polished brown loafer with socks…he looked more like a grown-up than a college boy. We were only a year apart in age, but I was still an immature kid writing cutesy stories for our college paper.

Party at his lake house a few months before we married.

By late afternoon we were hungry, but the restaurants were overflowing, so we grabbed hot dogs at the Dairy Queen and searched for a shady spot. We found the small, secluded Douglas Beach and parked under a tree. I could sense his nervousness now, his discomfort in those clothes I thought. I asked what he wanted to tell me. but he said, “not yet.” Grabbing an old blanket from the back, he led me through the hilly dunes toward the water.

Prancing along barefoot in my short shorts and halter top, I was happily looking forward to necking on the beach. He, on the other hand, trudged through the soft white mounds complaining about his shoes, whining, “they hurt, they’re getting scratched, they’re full of sand.” As we settled on the blanket, I convinced him to take the shoes and matching brown socks off, roll up his pants and not look like such a nerd. I was not that naive…shallow maybe. I wanted to be with the cool looking guy he usually was!

We’d made out plenty of times before and even spent a weekend in Chicago, so I knew deep inside he was probably the one. But right now, I just wanted to fool around a little and then get back and tell the girls…girlfriend talks are the best!

Sitting side-by-side for a while watching the waves flow in and out, he finally pulled me close and started explaining. “I left work early, drove around to find you, wasted time seeing the sights to work up my courage.” Courage? Oh geez, what did that mean from an always confident know-it-all-guy?

His voice thick with emotion, he said. “I know I really love you and that I always want to love you.” I may have said “I love you too,” but just as quickly added, “I’m staying here with my friends, not going back to the dorm!” Jim didn’t expect me to. He was going to find his buddy at the bar and head back to town. He wanted me to have fun, but I had to know he was going to love me forever.

The lightbulb finally flashed on.

Forever meant he wanted to marry me!

He was proposing and tied a little blade of sea grass around my finger.

With all the grown-upness I had, I said yes, I would love him forever too.

And then he kissed me.

All our lives we lived on or near water. Lake house, beaches along the Atlantic, our beach house in California, two years in Aruba and while landlocked in middle Georgia, we had many getaways to Hilton Head or Florida spring training! We recalled this day…actually he recalled it more…making fun of my ditziness and eagerness to tell my besties. I kept that piece of seagrass for several years but lost it along the way with all our moves. Each time we visited our home state, we hit this same spot in Saugatuck. As we grew along, it became just a drive by…but this moment rose up when someone said his name. ❤️

Be well, be happy, be kind.

Joan 😊

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